Moms Shades of Pink

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 "Should it be light or dark pink? Which do I go with?" Then, with a sigh, "I don't even know what to do."

My son and his fiance have been picking out wedding colors... ALL DAY. Which has lead my mind to struggle focusing on 50 shades of pink. After a couple hours of going through each and every color of pink in the spectrum, I step away for a time out. Funny, a time out. I used to put him in time out when he was a toddler. He'd sit in the corner with his head down, every time, and say, "I'm sorry mommy." Then I would explain to him that I only do this because I want him to be safe and learn right from wrong, because I love him more than all the stars in the sky... and he would tell me it was ok, and that he loved me more than a hotdog. 

Pink. Bold, or pastel? They continue, and so do I. Now lost in my own train of thought... pink. I was so scared. One pink line, or two? I can't really tell. I don't want to wait 5 minutes. Is it supposed to be a dark pink? I can see one...... my heart races as I hear someone else enter the McDonald's public restroom. Little do they know, the 19 year old girl in the stall next to them is going through the biggest moment of her life, alone, sitting on a toilet seat cover, her life suddenly based on dark pink, or light pink...one line or two? I close my eyes and take a deep breath. She leaves, after meticulously applying her bright red lipstick. As the door latches, I slowly open my eyes, and stare at the white stick in my hand. Clearly, two, bright pink lines. I sigh, before the tears start rolling, and say to myself, " I don't even know what to do."

I feel a tear trickle from my eye. As I try to nonchalantly wipe it from my cheek, I suddenly feel a hand on my shoulder. I look up, shaking myself out of 1998, and returning to the present. He looks at me and smiles. Suddenly, all my worries are gone, and it's just him and I. 

"Don't start crying already, mom." he says.  As I stand to give him a hug, I hear her say behind us,

"Are you sure you want all pink?", and before he can answer, I hear myself say, "Yes! Pink is a beautiful life changer. You want pink." He looks at me curiously, wondering what exactly I'm talking about, because I've never been fond of pink. Until today. Today, I remembered just how special the color pink is.

I grab his hand and smile. A genuine, happy smile. 

"Want to go to McDonald's?" I ask.

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